My children have been away from home this week. The break has given me lots of time to think about the fact that they’re able to leave home for periods of time without me and that means they’re growing up. Since life as a single mom often (always) involves thinking about their needs such as chauffeuring, school functions, sporting and dance events, plays, meal planning and medications especially for my Type 1 diabetic, that when I don’t need to do those things, I feel a little bit lost.
I was talking to a friend about this situation and she informed me that she has two ‘visions’. One is the vision where she sees herself, a single mom too, raising her kids and spending time together. Her vision includes where they will vacation, how things should be in school, and what they’ll do this weekend. But her other ‘vision’ includes what her life will look like when her kids grow up - where she’ll live, how she will support herself, etc. I realize that in a few short years, I won’t be chained to a mortgage or even a city - I’ll be free to follow my own dreams. I think my friend is wise. Most folks plan financially for the future. They buy insurance and invest in their 401K. But it’s also important to invest some creative energy in what the future is going to look like for you when you’re kids move away. Perhaps it will be you alone or you and a spouse or significant other, but it is important that you not allow that ‘empty nest’ day to arrive without some sort of plan. Write down your dreams for the future. Don’t think “I’m going to be too old to do…” There is no expiration date on us when our kids move out!!! Look at Betty White - a hit show and now a line of clothing…and she’s 88 years old! Dare to dream and dream big. Draw pictures of what you want your life to look like or cut pages out of a magazine if you are artistically impaired. Keep it nearby and look at it often. When the time comes, live the life of your dreams - you’ve worked hard. You’ve earned it.
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